Paul’s Pull List: Batman Incorporated

Batman Incorporated reviewed by Paul De Vries

Murray Batman and Robin Finkelstein are: Batman Incorporated!

Written by Grant Morrison with art by Chris Burnham
Review by Paul De Vries...so shut up.


 

Batman may not be the only orphan superhero in the DC Universe, but he sure acts like it!

I imagine he’ll be hanging out in the Justice League watch tower, Superman will be talking about some cute YouTube Puppy video he saw, and Batman will interject and say, “That reminds me of my dead parents, which is why I’m so dark and tortured.”

OK, fine! Then what are they getting you for Chanukah?!?

Superman has it worse. He’s a space orphan whose only chance at repopulating the universe with his people is by sleeping with the only other Kryptonian left: his cousin. His blonde, leggy, ridiculously gorgeous cousin.

 

Supergirl sexy pants

Va-Va-Doom!

That’s why I love that the current Robin, Damian Wayne, is Batman’s biological son. Maybe it’ll give the Dark Knight a chance to get over himself.

I had high hopes for Peter Tomasi’s Batman and Robin, but all that did was make me want to get a vasectomy. The father-son dynamic is as hopeless as Gotham is violent. But Grant Morrison, who is currently writing Batman, Incorporated, takes the same violent situations and treats them as run-of-the-mill family squabbles.

In the first issue, for instance, Batman tells Damian to stop killing people, and Damian tells Batman to stop lecturing him.

Bat-cow

Moo, moo, moo, moo, moo, moo, moo, moo, moo, moo, moo, moo, moo, moo, moo BAT COW!

Of course, this is not Batman’s first time being a father, since he raised all the other Robins as his sons.

You’d think that after Jason Todd, who was killed by the Joker, he’d rethink his parenting strategy, but luckily for us, the readers, he hasn’t!  Now he’s in a long and grueling battle over custody of Damian, not with lawyers, but with assassins and vigilantes.  Otherwise, let’s face it, Bruce would probably lose visitation rights and still have to pay for child support.

Batman is a layer

OK, so this is like the 5th kid that you’re putting in mortal danger like every night? What if I said “Please, stop.” Would that work?

Damian is the result of Batman’s hookup with Talia Al Ghul, the daughter of villainous Ra’s Al Ghul. The second issue explains that she grew up in luxury, but with an aloof father who was always too busy fighting his enemies to pay any attention to her.

He also kept her away from her mother… you know what?   He sure sounds a lot like Batman.

After reading it, I can really appreciate that my own divorced parents were able to stand each other’s company enough to celebrate my college graduation.

Paul had a lot of friends at his graduation!

I’ve given all five Batman titles a chance, and Batman, Incorporated has been the most satisfying, because it openly embraces the fact that Batman should be fun!

Fanboys have criticized Chris Burnham’s art for being too cartoonish, but his panels have a cinematic spring to them. And for those who think Grant Morrison’s writing is too campy, look what he’s working with!

A man dressed as flying mammal who likes to fight clowns and chase cat tail on roof tops! How can that ever not be hilarious?

Paul's Pull List

Paul with some dude drinking a soda.

Paul De Vries is a NYC Comedian and comic book enthusiast who knows the difference between a Goatee and a Van Dyke, yo.