comic book review

Comic Book A Day – Day 7 – Ultimate Comics New Ultimates # 1 (2010)

Ultimate Comics New Ultimates 1

Thor”s quadruple nipple sense tingling again can only mean 1 thing…danger!

So I”m really digging both Marvel”s Digital Comics Unlimited service as well as The Ultimate Universe line.  I”ve read the entire Ultimate Fantastic Four series and have moved on to some of the mini-series and am now reading Ultimate Comics New Ultimates.

Marvel Ultimates

Hawkeyes and Panthers and Tigers…oh my!

OK, so first off let”s look past the title “Ultimate Comics New Ultimates” which is basically The Ruth”s Chris Steak House of comics.  So these are The Ultimates, except that they”re actually not the original Ultimates from The Ultimate line at Marvel, they are New Ultimates from the new Ultimate line at Marvel which is now called “Ultimate Comics”?  Got it!  I think…

Captain America

The super soldier serum gave Captain America jet power between his thighs!

These “New Ultimates” seem to include Hawkeye (from Mash), Captain America, Iron Man, Thor, Valkyrie, Ka-Zar and his girlfriend and Black Panther.  The language is intense, the punches are never pulled and this first issue of what I think is the casino 4th Ultimates series (although it is most certainly the New Ultimates from The new Ultimate Comics line and not the old Ultimates from the Ultimate Line at Marvel) kicks major ass (or Asth as Drew Barrymore would thay).

 

I really enjoyed the tone and the ballsiness of the writing.  Plus with The Ultimate comics line at Marvel where established heros have died and gone rogue, there”s always the possibility of something colossally important possibly happening with every new panel.

For great story, great suspense and great character development, I give Ultimate Comics New Ultimates a new Ultimate penultimate rating of 5 out of 6 Aarons!

 

 

 

 

 

Paul’s Pull List – Red Hood and The Outlaws #11

Red Hood and The Outlaws # 11 Review!

Bats! In! Spaaaaaace!!!!!!

Reviewed by Paul De Vries, yo.

4/5 stars: Fantastic!

Jason Todd owes the Joker a debt of gratitude. If that clown hadn’t beaten him with a crowbar and then blown him up, he would have just grown to be one of far too many vigilantes on the Gotham beat. Honestly, that’s got to be the worst city in the DC universe to live if even people with superpowers don’t wanna take advantage of the affordable housing.

 

Jason Todd Reborn

I am either crawling out of the grave, or I am not going to need to buy pants ever again!

Instead, he’s experienced the rejuvenating effects of Ra’s Al Ghul’s Lazarus Pits and come back to life as the Red Hood – which is an old alias of the Joker. But let’s be honest, Jason Todd wears it better.

 

Roy Harper

Hey, uhh…these are someone else’s drugs and ahhhh someone else’s arms.

And now his new title has him globe-trotting and genre-hopping in Red Hood and the Outlaws with his new friends, Roy Harper, the former sidekick of Green Arrow whose drug addiction derailed his career in the 1970s.

 

Starfire cartoon

Wait. Now we want GIRLS to read comics?!?

and Koriand’r aka Starfire, whose parading around in skimpy bikinis and sleeping with her fellow “outlaws” has caused much controversy. Although my research shows she has never been modest. Of course, her character was toned down for the Cartoon Network show Teen Titans. But none of that matters for now, because I’m reviewing issue #11, which is in the middle of a story arc where she’s wearing a full to toe astronaut suit…so what if it’s a little form-fitting?

 

Starfire has never been modest

Trying to launch his new fashion line, Robin begs Starfire to wear his new dress. Oh and there’s a Green, talking Dolphin.

But first, I’ll recap issue #10: Jason is on a date with a cute blonde flight attendant named Isabel when suddenly he is seemingly attacked by a big alien being named Orn who turns out to be a good friend of Koriand’r. He then teleports everyone (including Isabel) onto a ship called the “S.S. Starfire” so Koriand’r can help defend her home world from a race of aliens known as the Blight.

 

Issue #11 is narrated by Roy who is tied and beaten by the Blight. His first line is “Seriously? This is what passes for torture on your world? Pffft.” And who can blame him? He’s used to Bush era techniques. Soon he starts narrating the events that led to his capture.

 

Starfire from Teen Titans Go!

I can haz clothez?!?

I don’t know if it’s coincidence, but now that Starfire is wearing more clothing, she’s suddenly a more interesting character with leadership skills and a tragic past. Although, I’ll admit that it’s equally entertaining to see her looking and acting like a Jersey Shore Barbarella.

 

Kenneth Rocafort Art

Rocafort plays with conventions like Snoop Dogg plays with hos. What?!?

The art is flawless as always. Kenneth Rocafort is always playful with the panels rejecting conventional rectangles, overlapping them, and giving them borders to match the mood or scene. Okay, so sometimes I have trouble knowing when I’ve hit a two page spread, but I’m going to go ahead and blame my own intelligence for that one.

 

Drawing the line at 2.99

How about drawing the line at .99 digital so I can afford to buy more than 1 comic book per week?

There’s a back up story, too, but it doesn’t really interact with the main story. I’m just glad I didn’t pay an extra dollar, although I guess that means that the main story had fewer pages.

Well, it felt like a deal at the time.

Paul De Vries

Paul and some dude with a soda

 

 

Paul’s Pull List: Batman Incorporated

Batman Incorporated reviewed by Paul De Vries

Murray Batman and Robin Finkelstein are: Batman Incorporated!

Written by Grant Morrison with art by Chris Burnham
Review by Paul De Vries...so shut up.


 

Batman may not be the only orphan superhero in the DC Universe, but he sure acts like it!

I imagine he’ll be hanging out in the Justice League watch tower, Superman will be talking about some cute YouTube Puppy video he saw, and Batman will interject and say, “That reminds me of my dead parents, which is why I’m so dark and tortured.”

OK, fine! Then what are they getting you for Chanukah?!?

Superman has it worse. He’s a space orphan whose only chance at repopulating the universe with his people is by sleeping with the only other Kryptonian left: his cousin. His blonde, leggy, ridiculously gorgeous cousin.

 

Supergirl sexy pants

Va-Va-Doom!

That’s why I love that the current Robin, Damian Wayne, is Batman’s biological son. Maybe it’ll give the Dark Knight a chance to get over himself.

I had high hopes for Peter Tomasi’s Batman and Robin, but all that did was make me want to get a vasectomy. The father-son dynamic is as hopeless as Gotham is violent. But Grant Morrison, who is currently writing Batman, Incorporated, takes the same violent situations and treats them as run-of-the-mill family squabbles.

In the first issue, for instance, Batman tells Damian to stop killing people, and Damian tells Batman to stop lecturing him.

Bat-cow

Moo, moo, moo, moo, moo, moo, moo, moo, moo, moo, moo, moo, moo, moo, moo BAT COW!

Of course, this is not Batman’s first time being a father, since he raised all the other Robins as his sons.

You’d think that after Jason Todd, who was killed by the Joker, he’d rethink his parenting strategy, but luckily for us, the readers, he hasn’t!  Now he’s in a long and grueling battle over custody of Damian, not with lawyers, but with assassins and vigilantes.  Otherwise, let’s face it, Bruce would probably lose visitation rights and still have to pay for child support.

Batman is a layer

OK, so this is like the 5th kid that you’re putting in mortal danger like every night? What if I said “Please, stop.” Would that work?

Damian is the result of Batman’s hookup with Talia Al Ghul, the daughter of villainous Ra’s Al Ghul. The second issue explains that she grew up in luxury, but with an aloof father who was always too busy fighting his enemies to pay any attention to her.

He also kept her away from her mother… you know what?   He sure sounds a lot like Batman.

After reading it, I can really appreciate that my own divorced parents were able to stand each other’s company enough to celebrate my college graduation.

Paul had a lot of friends at his graduation!

I’ve given all five Batman titles a chance, and Batman, Incorporated has been the most satisfying, because it openly embraces the fact that Batman should be fun!

Fanboys have criticized Chris Burnham’s art for being too cartoonish, but his panels have a cinematic spring to them. And for those who think Grant Morrison’s writing is too campy, look what he’s working with!

A man dressed as flying mammal who likes to fight clowns and chase cat tail on roof tops! How can that ever not be hilarious?

Paul's Pull List

Paul with some dude drinking a soda.

Paul De Vries is a NYC Comedian and comic book enthusiast who knows the difference between a Goatee and a Van Dyke, yo.